That Was a Mistake ...

... that I'll probably make again! Last night as I was filling my water glass before going to bed, it occurred to me that I had forgotten to take pills that day! Most importantly, I had forgotten to take my Tamoxifen! DANG!! So, without thinking very clearly, I took it before I went to bed. Only after getting into bed did I think, "Gee, I hope it doesn't upset my stomach since I didn't eat before taking it". Sure enough ... I was awake for about 3 hours in the night just trying not to move a muscle, just in case moving set off a gag reflex. I'm happy to say the feeling had passed (without anything gross happening) by 6:00 a.m. and I was then able to get some sleep. You could say I've had a very slow start to my day.

I had committed today to taking Otto on a walk, since we hadn't been out for any length of time for a few days. It as so pretty out along the river that we ended up walking farther and longer than I would have otherwise and it wasn't such a good idea. Instead of turning up the hill at the Broadway bridge, we walked further along the river bank and then had quite a lengthy walk back. My right leg had seized up pretty solidly by the time we made it to Broadway and it was slow going the rest of the way home, which wasn't Otto's idea of a good time. A breeze had also picked up by then and we were walking into it. It was going right through my warm, fuzzy hat and I was pretty chilled by the time we got home. Nonetheless, it was a beautiful day to be out and Otto and I had a good time.

I took a frisbee for the park this time and by the third throw, it was in pieces. Good thing I brought the ball, too! We had a good play in the snow before continuing on our long walk.

I went to an Arbonne party last night and purchased some new make-up ... items I'm short on. I might as well throw a little business Paige's way and the product looks good. Paige and Luke are friends and Laurel kindly hosted a party for her. It was nice to see Paige and the other women who were there ... all neighbours and friends. Thanks, Laurel.

That Was a Mistake ...

And Now For Today's Positives

And Now For Today's Positives

My Side Effect Wordle

I decided to plug all my annoying side effects into Wordle so that font size indicates the level of trouble I perceive them to be. As you can see, my itchy arch, numb toes and dry skin are of little real consequence and the fact that I've had to cut back my previously moderate boozing to almost nothing seems more bothersome to me than it really should be. It only bothers me when I actually WANT a drink, which isn't so often after all. I'll get over it! Besides, the couple of times I've had a drink since starting on Tamoxafin, I've ended up feeling kind of crappy. That's pretty much a disincentive.

My joints, mobility issues and my sore shoulder are the worst of my side effects right now, though the problems with my right shoulder are only acerbated by cancer treatments - not caused by it. I expect the side effects will be weighted differently after next week. After I return to work problems with fatigue, sleeplessness, and hot flashes will likely be bigger than they seem now.

So, for a side effect update, this Wordle really tells it all. I still have my joint problems and had really exptected them to be over with by now. No such luck ... so far. Last night I had a good sleep and I attribute that to my reading the bottle of Melatonin that I have and learning that I can take up to 3 before bedtime. I took 2 and maybe that's why I actually slept well.

Of course, it's easy to forget all about the nasty side effects when I have good company and that I did today. Today my cousin Lori picked me up in her VERY cute car (not a Rav, but still cute) and took me to Calories for lunch. I have so enjoyed reconnecting with my cousin with whom I share some of my best childhood memories.

Uncle Norm phoned, too. He's my colour man. He has flowers in his yard and very kindly sends me photos.

And now Otto needs a little attention. He's been such a good dog!

My Side Effect Wordle

This is the card Kevin got me ... but was afraid to sign!

I think it's very funny! It does pretty much cover all the bases! Still, it's probably a good idea that he had and signed another very nice card.

Click on the images to see them in a larger format.

This is the card Kevin got me ... but was afraid to sign!

Thanks, EVERYONE!

Well ... another year older ... feels like twenty. While that might sound awful (and there's no doubt it has been), the plus is that I will start feeling younger in the coming months for a change! I can't wait for that part to kick in. And it will. I know it.

I did, of course, have a VERY happy birthday. Thanks, Sylvia for lunch, taxi service and the whole bit. It was so nice. And thanks, Cheryl and Marion for coming along.

Kevin came home from work bearing flowers (aren't they pretty?) and gifts. I had said not to get me anything because I would prefer to just do some guilt-free shopping in Kentucky. But he didn't listen and he got me a doodad for letting me listen to my iPod in the car. It's something I've been needing since the old doohickey we had for that purpose isn't working anymore. I'm still guilt-free shopping in Kentucky, though.

I had a nice chat with both of my kids. Hannah was just going into class and Leah was with her so I had birthday greetings from them both. Luke was having a "snow day" so he was taking advantage of the extra time to study for a couple of exams scheduled for this week and he has some assignments due this week, too. He thinks he'll have a snow day today, too, and I don't doubt it based on their weather forecast. Snow days don't happen very often in Kentucky but since he's been there they've been an annual event. Last year his University shut down for a week in October because of a hurricane and then for another week in January for an ice and snow storm. And now, this year, a couple of days at least for snow. They're not at all prepared for snow and ice.

I had several other calls and so many emails and facebook greetings! Thanks so much everybody for the cheerful birthday greetings!! I feel like ELLEN!! VERY spoiled! I'm sure Michelle Obama was trying to phone me but just couldn't get through. I know Uncle Norman tried to phone and was unable to reach me. He sent me flowers from Nanaimo instead ... in the form of beautiful photos from his own back yard. And eagles, too. Ruth is an avid birder and Norm is her photographer.

Happy Birthday today, Dwayne! Dwayne and I shared a birthday hug last night ... an hour before my birthday ended and an hour before his began. He brought over some aquarium plants for Kevin's tanks for me. He's so thoughtful!

Thanks, EVERYONE!

Happy Hot Flash To Me!

Who needs candles when you can have a hot flash?!

So it's my birthday. Always a happy event in my life. I'm not used to it being so public, though. I'm quite content to walk around all day just smiling and feeling a spring in my step and saying to myself, "it's your birthday".

This cake is the BIG surprise that almost knocked me off my chair at Jim and Lynne's. We finished dinner and Lynne went to the kitchen to bring out a dessert she had made and when everyone started singing, I joined in but was confused and was trying to quickly figure out whose birthday we were celebrating. It took me almost until the "dear Heather" part of the birthday song to figure out that we were celebrating my birthday. It was kind of funny! Would somebody PLEASE remind me to straighten my wig before all photo ops?!! Oh, and the cake was SOOOO good!

And then yesterday Norma took me out for our sister birthdays, hers being yesterday and mine being today. Beside the very cool "rap" she wrote for me, she gave me a stack of bins "for the orna-mental organizer". HAHA. And very useful, too. I already have plans for them.

Today I'm being taken for lunch by Sylvia, Cheryl and Marion.

I never mind birthdays. In fact, I always enjoy mine even if only quietly. I do wish I didn't feel so far removed from the birthday girl I was one year ago (see photo at left), only a few days before the biopsy that would set me on this unwelcome journey. I want to be her again. I'll see if I swing that, but I'm not so sure. This joint issue is getting very old. I've been feeling partially crippled for just shy of four months now. My best birthday present would be total relief of that problem. I'll hope for it yet. Before we go to Kentucky at least. The day my joints are really working for me again will be cause for a real celebration.

Anyway, as Scarlett says, "I'll worry about that tomorrow". Today ... I celebrate another birthday!!

Thanks, everyone, for the birthday wishes you've been sending my way ... for the calls, the cards, the emails, and the facebook greetings! You make my day, not just today but every day! Let me have a hot flash in your honour. Easy peasy!

Happy Hot Flash To Me!

Rap For The Christmas Ornament Boxes

Today I had birthday tea/coffee and scones with Norma at Tastebuds! It was so nice! She picked me up and insisted on paying for everything and yet, it was HER BIRTHDAY!! What's that about??!! Happy Birthday, Norma, and thanks so much!

Norma claims to be much amused by my ongoing Christmas boxes saga and so, in honour of that, she wrote this hilarious rap (Get it? RAP ... instead of WRAP? Get it?? **yuck yuck**) for me. It's so funny. Click on the photos to see larger, more readable images. Try to read it in "rap mode". I'm not so good at that so I need to listen to some rap so I can pick up on the appropriate rhythm. If you can do it, please rap it to me! Norma's so clever at these (and many other) kinds of things. If you know her, you know what I mean. You've probably seen her in action over the years.

Anyway, we had a great chat and didn't even cover half of the many things we could have talked about. She's such an inspiration with all the things she does and gets involved with. I hope I get to the point where I so actively pursue my interests. I have lots of interests but sometimes find it hard to move past the research and planning stage to the actual "DOING STAGE". That is my personal challenge.

Happy Birthday greetings also go out to Tana for yesterday and Marina today, too.

Rap For The Christmas Ornament Boxes

Super Bowl - Yeah Saints!

It was so nice to see the Saints win the Super Bowl, though I wouldn't have been upset to see it go the other way either. The best part about Super Bowl was spending it at Patty and Ron's. Patty must have been cooking all week! There was so much food, they'll be eating yummy leftovers for a while. Patty and I both made guacamole but we used different recipes so it was fun to do some taste testing. They were both good with different dominant flavours, Patty's being cilantro and mine being lime. It's all good. And the turkey chili was great! Well, so was everything as you can see.

Their tv makes ours look like pipsqueak tv!  Mind you, we're at the point where our tv is pretty old school compared to everyone else's.  We're just holding out for some more technological developments ... uh huh. That's my story and I'm stickin' to it!

Super Bowl - Yeah Saints!

Lightening The Load

I can't resist the occasional peanut butter and banana sandwich for lunch!

Today I've been busy in that storage room. I have sorted through a mountain (not much of an exaggeration) of papers and stuff. Much of it will be shredded and thrown away. The innate librarian in me was never able to throw away a good piece of information, a quote, an inspiring image, and so forth and then file it away in an elaborate vertical file system. That was before the internet. Long before. There was a whole lot of that stuff that was just needlessly taking up space. I have to remind myself to be fierce about getting rid of things that really are of no value to us. I'm genetically predisposed to keeping. For example, I KNOW I'm never going to make that item for which I clipped the instructions from a magazine! Pitch it already! I still have piles of stuff to go through. Large piles of the kids' school work ... lots can go, some will be kept. And school supplies! My how they've gathered over the years. I'll have a large box to deliver to the school.

I did come across a bunch of scattered items of sentimental value ... mementos from weddings, births and deaths ... newspaper clippings about people I'm fond of. I found Barb and Kevin's wedding napkins, Elaine's funny pre-wedding photo where it looks like the priest is grabbing her boob, Uncle Keith's eulogy, memories of Auntie Jean, Auntie Elsie, cousin Bob, my Dad, Laurie and Mark's wedding, A newspaper clipping of Cowboy Wade in action, newspaper clippings about Uncle Reg, Hannah's music festival results, Luke's sporting recognitions, ticket stubs from concerts, programs from plays, and so much more. I just kept throwing it into my "sentimental folder", which I will go through more thoroughly later. There was much already in it that I haven't even looked at yet. I want to take some time to enjoy it.

Last night we had a very nice dinner at Jim and Lynne's. Graham and Allan are so interesting as they grow and mature. They're smart as can be! I can't wait to see where their lives take them. They both went out with friends for the evening. For dessert, Lynne made a scrumptiously rich and chocolaty cake decorated so prettily! I tell you, they threw me a surprise that almost knocked me over. I couldn't figure out what was going on until it hit me. I won't elaborate quite yet ... I will later ... but man, I was SURPRISED! It was kind of funny! And very sweet! I'm not just talking about the cake.

I was beat and hit the hay early. It's been a cycle lately of one night of bad sleep followed by a sleepy day and a solid night's sleep and then another night of poor sleep and so forth. Last night I had a relatively good sleep while Kevin met up with the guys for some poker.

Today we'll go to Ron and Patty's to watch the Superbowl game! Go Saints!

Lightening The Load

TA DA!! Christmas Decorations Put Away!

I'll bet you thought it would never happen! Me, too!! And yet, the Christmas boxes are all neatly packed away until another 10 months have passed. Kevin helped. We cleared a lot of junk out of the "junk room" and made some space. I'm very happy.

This doesn't mean we're done though, unfortunately. There is still a lot of progress to be made in the old junk/storage room but now that there's some space to maneuver and some initial progress made, I'm primed for the project. Maybe. I say that now, of course.

I must also thank Lynne and Jim for their help! They don't even know they helped! They've invited us over for dinner tonight so that freed up some time for Kevin and I to focus on that room and not have to fuss over dinner. Thanks, Jim and Lynne!

Now for a breather! That was tiring!

By the way, no pressure Norma and Lou! Can you believe they still don't have their Christmas decorations put away?! Really!!

TA DA!! Christmas Decorations Put Away!

Otto Is Convinced He's a Lap Dog

Otto Is Convinced He's a Lap Dog

Kevin and Otto and The Big Play

Kevin and Otto and The Big Play

The Saturday Hair Report

It IS getting longer. It looked darker last week, though. Now it seems like the cream ... or the silver ... is rising to the top!

I gave myself a little 60s flip, with limited resources mind you, just to give you some idea of the possibilities!

Leg hairs are still peculiar. A couple of little ones starting above the mid-shin line but if you were to examine my leg you would be very puzzled by the oddity of the growth in general. Some amost invisible hairs have appeared on my arms but I could hardly ever find hairs there even before all of this. No arm pit hair yet. No even under my right arm. And, well, just in case you're wondering ... my most private of hairs are returning, too. Again, oddly. A few long stragglers amidst a bit of fuzz is all. I was never RICH in body hair in the first place. I wonder how I ever ended up with so much on my head?

The Saturday Hair Report

Yeah Knights!

Bellarmine won their first official game of the season. Luke got 1 assist for 1 point.

Yeah Knights!

A Little Lacrosse With Our Pancakes

We're in the process of monitoring live stats for Luke's lacrosse game that's taking place right now. They've been neck and neck through the first period and Luke has had an assist. It's 4 to 4 right now.

For the game, I made oatmeal pancakes. I've never made this recipe before. I had to start it last night by soaking the oats in buttermilk in the fridge overnight. I loaded them with blueberries, which are mostly on the underside. I must say they were delicious and I'll make them again. They're a little more delicate than regular pancakes so I had to be careful to not make them too big or they'd have fallen apart when flipped. Here's the recipe. You have to scroll down a bit for the actual recipe.

Again, I didn't sleep great last night. ANNOYING! Sleep disturbance isn't listed as a side effect for Tamoxifen but Cheryl reminded me that it IS a side effect of menopause and since Tamoxifen gives you all the other side effects of menopause, it only makes sense that sleep problems would be part of the package. Funny it's not listed, though, since they do list a lot of the other problems such as hot flashes and the general drying up of one's feminine parts. Great. I've also had a mildly upset stomach a few times since I've started the Tamoxifen. And yesterday I noticed that I feel inappropriately hungry ... hungry when I shouldn't be (like the middle of the night). Maybe that's why women usually gain weight on this drug?

Today I had pomegranate juice for the first time since last Saturday's disgusting incident. So far so good, except for the fact I don't really care for pomegranate juice in the first place. I'd rather be left with the taste of blueberry oatmeal pancakes in my mouth but since you have to take the pills on a full stomach, that sequence just isn't in the cards.

I also had two bad jaw aches lately. One at 6:00 last night and then at 4:00 a.m. I got tylenol more quickly for the one in the middle of the night. I almost passed out from the pain at supper time last night. When I could feel my rapid release tylenol finally kicking it, it was the sweetest relief.

I got over my jaw ache in time to enjoy dinner at Norm's with Kevin, Don and Syl. It was nice to get together and catch up. And Norm was in very good spirits, it being the start of a major Vietnamese holiday.

Arden just picked up a ground ball! They even called him "Brick" in the live stats!! That's SOOOO funny! Arden, if you recall, is Luke's buddy from here who is also on a lacrosse scholarship to Bellarmine University in Louisville, Kentucky.

GO KNIGHTS!!!

A Little Lacrosse With Our Pancakes

Flowers On Friday

Sylvia dropped by this afternoon with some cheery flowers! Thanks, Syl!

Otto and I went on our walk today. It's mild but is sunshine too much to ask for? Sunshine would have been nice. So far we haven't had any sun on our walks. We did what has become our "usual route". This time I remembered the step counter and we logged about 5100 steps which is about 2.5 miles. or 4 km. Good! We saw the strangest thing today. We saw a young man pulling a big cart of what looked like bunches of broken wood and behind it was tied one of those kidmobiles that pull behind bicycles. It was filled with stuff. There was more stuff attached but I was too stunned to remember and by the time I saw him he was right beside us so I didn't get my camera out in time. He was going down the bridge with a bunch of traffic behind him. What on earth was going on? All I could guess was that it might be a homeless person moving his "stuff" to a new location.

And this. What in the heck is this supposed to be? It's some kind of sculpture made of sweaters, snow and water. I'm not getting it, though. I must not have enough imagination. Is it supposed to look like something?

This morning ... TADA ... Otto and I started working on those dang Christmas decoration boxes! But you know how it goes ... or maybe you don't ... CHAOS BEFORE ORDER! So we went from one tidy pile in Luke's bedroom to a whole big mess in every room upstairs. That's because our upstairs storage room has become such a disaster that it has to be cleared out and organized before the Christmas decorations can be put away. I made good headway this morning, though, and I still have a long way to go. I would love to have it done before Kevin gets home but that's not going to happen. In fact, he's going to have to help me with some of it. In the end, it will be so much better. And those decorations will be tucked away! This is the before photo when the boxes were mostly neatly piled in Luke's room.

I had a bit of trouble sleeping last night. That's unusual for me. Typically I sleep well and so two nights of bad sleep in three days makes me wonder if it isn't the Tamoxifen. I need to read the list of side effects again because I don't remember that being one.

Limbs - same old. Very old. With some doorknobs, I need to use two hands to turn them. I never had to think about it before but I have trouble now opening our front door unless I use two hands.

One more week at home before I head back to the office! As I said, it's both scary and exciting! In fact, I was really dreading it for a while but I realize now that the reason I dreaded it was because my brain was still not functioning very well. I easily became overwhelmed by activity and information while I was going through all of this and it was only a week or so ago, after I almost literally "felt" the air and sun creep back into my brain, that I have felt more confident of being able to manage at work. It was like somebody suddenly swept the cobwebs out of my skull and opened some windows. I didn't even realize how crippled my brain had been until it suddenly felt better. It's hard to explain. I liken it a bit to going through life not knowing you badly need glasses and then getting them and having it open up a whole new world of clarity that you didn't realize you were missing out on. Just because my brain is now a little stronger and capable doesn't mean my memory has returned to before cancer treatment levels. In fact, once I get back to work I think I'll realize even more how bad my memory has become. It really surprises me now the things I will suddenly forget or not quite be able to nail down in my memory ... things that I wouldn't have lost before. My memory wasn't firing on all cylinders before all of this but it's now significantly worse and I can never anticipate what I'll forget because it will be things I can't believe aren't right there which makes it all the more embarrassing. How does one prep for that? You might be offended to know how often I've forgotten your last names and have even hesitated over some first names! It shocks me! I understand that it's part of "chemo brain" and that it should improve over the next year. Let's hope so. It's embarrassing sometimes!

It's the weekend. Time to forget about the things I can't do and focus on the things I can do. Such as deal with that disaster I've created upstairs. YIKES!!

Have a wonderful weekend everyone! It's SUPERBOWL time if you're looking for an excuse for a party!!

Flowers On Friday

Hilarious - Dead Fly Art

For my amusement, Berny sent me "Dead Fly Art" today! I am TOTALLY amused!

Thinking of all the people I know on beaches right now, I'll feature this one. See more of them here.

I wonder if the artist used tweezers? I'm grossed out at the thought of positioning them by hand.

Hilarious - Dead Fly Art

Real Men Like Quiche

Asparagus Quiche. This is what we're having for supper tonight with a spinach salad.

Here's the new-to-me recipe except that I added 2 extra eggs and made sure I had 2 cups of milk because my pastry shells were bigger. It worked perfectly, though we haven't tasted it yet.

Speaking of taste, Kevin's reggae coffee was good but not GREAT. That's according to Kevin. I don't drink coffee. I don't even know how to make it.

Otto and I only had a short walk today ... around the block and through the alleys. I got groceries, prepped vegetables for the fridge and made quiche. Kevin is home again.

Real Men Like Quiche

More Thanks to More Team

Two more names came to mind. Here's a new Wordle of Thanks! Make sure you're included.

More Thanks to More Team

Updated Thanks!

I thought of a name I neglected to include in my earlier Thanks. So here's a new Wordle Thanks that's more complete. I hesitate to say "complete" because surely some other names will come to me yet.

Sorry if I've missed anyone so far. Let me know if I have.

And know that you've all helped me so much in your own way ... even when you don't know it.

Click on the picture to see a bigger version.

Updated Thanks!