Party's Over. The Dirty Work Begins.

Be prepared to grimace! The next photos are NOT pretty by any stretch. They are downright YUCK!

This is what greeted me a couple of weeks ago on a Saturday morning when I went into our living room to water a plant near our front window. I felt it before I saw it. Not moisture. Oh, no! The surfaces were already dry. What I felt was the rippled hardwood under my feet. I looked down with shock and only as my eyes moved up did I see the brown stain on the wall and the baseboards and then the mess on the windowsill. And then more. EEEEK!! I must have happened shortly after last Saturday when I last went to that part of the house to water that plant.

So, the insurance adjuster and contractors have been by. We have estimates and quotes and right now there is a giant moisture sucking machine running by the wall because of the moisture behind the surface. In all the 22 years we've been here, nothing like this has ever happened before. I've learned a new term: Ice Damming. Something to do with the way the snow melted and froze and melted and froze, lifting the cedar shakes. It's wet inside the wall and the insulation is wet. Ultimately, it looks like that front wall with our beautiful window and window frame will have to come off and be replaced. We've been promised that our window will look just like it does now when all is said and done. We're lucky it was just the one wall and that the problem didn't wrap around to the other walls or effect the ceiling.

The hardwood is pretty rippled in about a five foot square area. We're leaving it to dry for several weeks and see how much it flattens out before deciding how much work it will need. If we're lucky, a light sanding and coating will be enough. If we're unlucky, it means replacing the whole floor. EEEK!!

The outside of the house will have to be painted, too. The brown stain doesn't come off. I tried on parts of the windowsill already.

So, that's my sad story. I was so sure our next big home event would be a new kitchen!  Wahhhhh!!

Party's Over. The Dirty Work Begins.

Dancin' The Night Away!

Oh yeah! There was LOTS of dancing at Josh and Noelene's wedding!

Dancin' The Night Away!

Finally! A Quilt Show and Tell!

Remember this mix of fabrics I bought with a gift certificate I won? When I chose the various fabrics at the time, I wasn't consciously selecting ones that I thought might look good together but when they arrived and I laid them out, I thought they coordinated quite nicely. And so they became the basis for a wedding quilt for Josh and Noelene. I added a few more fabric selections for filler and some white cotton and ...

... Mom and I made this! I'm SO pleased with how it turned out. We used the Geese in the Park pattern. We made several rectangles of "flying geese" and then instead of placing them in a flying geese pattern, we turned them to make diamonds and zigzags. I like knowing that the pattern is actually a hidden "flying geese" pattern since it's made for a couple of pilots. Click on the photos to see bigger images.

I chose the fabrics and cut them and did the final applique for the finishing touch. Mom did all the precision machine stitching (not my forte ... yet) and provided her technical knowledge. Mom had Tara from Kyle do the long-arm quilting and the binding. She used the trees and leaf pattern from the forest fabric as the basis for the quilting design. I love it and I know Josh and Noelene will, too.

You can't imagine how hard it has been for me to keep it a secret! I've been so excited about actually finishing a quilt and doing it with Mom.  

This is the back. I took this photo before I did the applique so if you're looking for the camouflaged applique, don't strain your eyes.

The appliqued pieces that have since been stitched onto the back of the quilt are meant to give it some special meaning for Josh and Noelene. The problem is that I'm relatively inexperienced with applique. I'm quite confident with straight line applique as I've been doing on Hannah's handkerchief quilt but when there are little curves and indents ... well, I learned that I suck. I did improve as I went, though, so that's promising. I thought it was very clever to camouflage the appliques in the forest fabric on the back of the quilt. Future children might have fun finding the elephant, the bear, the rabbit, and the two airplanes among the trees and owls on the back of the quilt. They're camouflaged so well that my sloppy applique work doesn't show up so much. Bonus. I finished the applique on the Friday morning before the wedding. A close call.

The elephant represents South Africa where Noelene grew up and where her parents live.

The rabbit is for 2011 being the year of the rabbit. Can you see it? It took Kevin a couple of days of looking to be able to identify it. I told him he needs glasses!

There are two airplanes to acknowledge that both Josh and Noelene are pilots. They're both passionate about flying.

The bear represents both Josh's connection to White Bear, Saskatchewan and his and Noelene's love of the great white north and the land and the wildlife there.

For the label, I chose a handkerchief with shamrocks embroidered on it because I know Josh is proud of his Irish heritage.

Mom and I were SO excited to not just start a quilt but to FINISH a quilt! I want to start another one right now and I want to try my hand at machine stitching. SCARY!

It was all the more fun making a quilt knowing it was for Josh and Noelene, who we love so much.

Finally! A Quilt Show and Tell!

She's Leavin' On A Jet Plane

I dropped Hannah and Matt off at the airport a while ago. They've gone back to Vancouver. It's so sad to see them go. They were only here for a long weekend and we had such a good time with them. We thoroughly enjoyed having Matt here for the first time, too.

Most of my photos from the weekend were taken on the dance floor at Josh and Noelene's wedding. What fun we had!

Hannah and Matt tried out our 3D glasses last night. Don't they look futuristic?

She's Leavin' On A Jet Plane

A Happy Event

This is why I've been so quiet lately! We had a wedding in the family. The first wedding among my brothers' and my kids! This is Josh and Noelene! It was a beautiful wedding and we had a GREAT time last night! So much fun! We danced and sang ... it was a regular family extravaganza! We've had the chance to get to know Noelene's parents who are here from South Africa and one of her sisters who came all the way from her Japan with her little boy who entertained us immensely! Kathy's boyfriend, Ricardo, flew in from Costa Rica. Hannah and Matt, who we met for the first time, came from Vancouver. It was just so remarkable to have these people from so far away all here at the same time. I wish Noelene's sister and her family from France had been able to come and I really wish Luke could have been here, too. He was playing a lacrosse game against Hobart during the reception and even though they lost, Luke did get a goal for Josh and Noelene. And, of course, I do hope my Dad was enjoying seeing the first wedding of a grandchild from his vantage point. He would have loved to be have there, too.

And now ... to brush my teeth (UGH) and get moving again! Off to Acton brunch and then the gift opening!

A Happy Event

Lisa Rendall

That's Lisa on the left. Then Shawna, me, Rob, and Ramblin' Dave. I see that I looked as awful as I felt. No, that's not true. I felt even worse that day.

While I've known that Lisa has been going through a particularly rough time, it nonetheless came as a shock and made for an upsetting day to hear on the radio this morning that she left this world yesterday. I'm so sorry. I reflected today on what an incredible and indelible mark she left on our community and on the world since her diagnosis and how she worked tirelessly to raise awareness and help other people with cancer diagnoses.

I met Lisa briefly when I (stupidly) agreed to take part in the C95 Radio Marathon for breast cancer. I say "stupidly" because it was right at the end of my last chemo and I was feeling quite awful and I was all puffed up from the steroids and from edema. Actually, I felt worse than awful. I really felt like shit and had no business leaving the house but I felt it important to do my part.  And, to make matters worse, I was very weepy. I cried all the way to the mall where the event was taking place and then I cried when I introduced myself. I mostly managed to hold it together through the interview with Rambling Dave ... he was so great about helping me keep it together.

After the interview I met Lisa and we had a little chat. And after that, from time to time, Lisa and I would exchange emails. She would so kindly inquire as to how I was doing and I would ask the same of her. While we didn't know each other well, I thought it was just generous of her to take that time to care. That was only less than a year and a half ago when I met Lisa and I remember noting that she didn't even look like she'd been through anything awful. In fact, she looked great! I recall hoping hope that soon I would look so well. It's hard to believe that cancer took her. It wasn't without a fight, that's for sure. 

Lisa will be profoundly missed by so many.

Lisa Rendall

I Knew A Woman Lovely In Her Bones

I was able to see two more of Alexa's dance group performances on the weekend! I quite loved seeing all the dancing. Very beautiful! And how nice to see the passion with which these young people dance. It's so nice to see. Alexa dances beautifully. She floats and has gorgeous lines.

On Saturday, we also watched Luke's lacrosse game against Air Force Academy. It was webcast, which is much appreciated. Unfortunately, Bellarmine lost to Air Force. Luke got a couple of goals and an assist, so that was the upside of the game for me.

Over the weekend, we played cards with Darrel and Lynn, spent some time with Ron and Patty, and saw Josh and Noelene who are in town to prepare for their WEDDING!!!!  We also met Noelene's parents who are here from South Africa! We're so excited about this wedding! And excited to have Ricardo, Hannah, and Matt in town, too! I wish Luke could be here for the wedding and I know he wants to be, too, but his coach would surely disown him if he were to miss a game!

"I knew a woman lovely in her bones" is a line from one of my favourite poems: I Knew A Woman by Theodore Roethke. My all time favourite poem by Roethke, though, is My Papa's Waltz. I also love The Waking ... "I learn by going where I have to go" ... which is what I'm doing more than ever.

I Knew A Woman Lovely In Her Bones

Thank you, Mossy Marcie!

My curls got a little dolled up when this very cute little handmade woolly flower arrived in my mailbox! It was sent to me by a very kind woman and her family. Marcie handcrafts with wool and other things. In May she will start selling her creations at an Etsy shop. Check her out at her blog, Mossy.

Here is how Marcie defines her blog:

A website devoted to families who share a love of slowing down, simplifying, finding connections, getting dirty, playing outside, community gardens, things with history, small houses, tag sales, compost bins, early risers, dirty fingernails, dirty feet, hiking, mudpies, field guides, good music, dress-up bins, and all things handmade. 

Thank you, Mossy Marcie!

Happy 21st Birthday, Luke!

Happy 21st Birthday, Luke!

Signs of Spring!

Ahhhh ... what a lovely parking spot I have on campus. And yes, I pay good money to park there! *grumble grumble grumble*

Signs of Spring!

And Now For Something Completely Different ...

... meet Eddie R. Gyle, aka "Socks". He's the owner/operator of a gambling establishment in Chicago and an avid golfer. Hal Capone was murdered and Socks didn't do it!

Yes, Kevin was at a murder mystery function tonight that involved 135 people. Kev said it was a real good time and he, of course, looked smashing!

And Now For Something Completely Different ...

Tragedy. Sadness. Hope.

There are so many sad stories in the world. If you look for them, you'll find plenty. More than you can handle. You find plenty enough without looking for them.

Every now and then a sad story reaches you and is so heartbreaking that it just makes you angry. There are big, sad stories like the many in Japan since the earthquake and tsunami there. And there is the sad local story of Mandi Schwartz losing her battle with cancer at such a young age. Too young. No wonder some of us who have survived cancer experience varying levels of "survivor guilt". It would have been awful to have lost my life to cancer but for someone as young and strong and vital as Mandi ... it's tragic. There she was living her dream ... playing hockey at Yale ... and wham! Cancer! Two years later she's gone despite fighting like hell. Here's the story from TSN and a tribute written by friend and teammate, Carolyn Murphy.

If this has already brought to mind more heartbreak than you can endure right now, don't read any further. This next heartbreaking story came to me yesterday and if you've ever thought you've had bad luck, I doubt you've had this kind of bad luck. It's difficult to even contemplate!

It's about Nathan and Elisa Bond of Brooklyn, New York. They have an 18 month old daughter.  In February of this year, Nathan at age 38 was diagnosed with Stage 3 rectal cancer. Nine days later, his wife Elisa at age 36 was diagnosed with Stage 4 metastic breast cancer. In case you don't know about cancer staging, there is no Stage 5. Stage 4 is as bad as it gets. Mine was Stage 2.

“I’m sure many of you have been waiting to hear how it went with Nathan’s first day of chemo, however, I must deliver some more bad news before we get to that.  On Wednesday, February 23rd, I was diagnosed with breast cancer.  Yes, me too.  Cancer.  That’s right, read it again.  Nathan AND Elisa have cancer.  TOGETHER.  LIKE NOW.” – Elisa Bond 

"What am I fighting? It's a ghost. I'm fighting a ghost. It's lurking in my body but I can't grab it by it's throat and punch it and kick it and yell it and punch it some more. It's a part of me. It's embedded itself in me. I have to trust that the drugs and the poison they're going to put in me knows how to fight a ghost." - Elisa Bond 

"Perhaps if I just get on a plane to South America I won't have cancer. If I can just get out of this place, I can leave it behind. It's all a big mistake. Each step of the way, they have been talking about someone else. It's not me. This is NOT my story. Fuck the plane, I need to run.  Get out of my way.  MOVE.  I gotta run.  I just have to run away. But I can't. Sadie. Nathan. Nathan and Sadie. This can't be. This can't be their story either." - Elisa Bond

Such an awful story but I have to tell you, too, that despite the unbelievable horror of what they're going through, Nathan and Elisa demonstrate an incredible amount of grace and wit along with their candor. The Bond family already had a blog before their tragic diagnoses but it has now taken a dramatic change in focus, of course. I think there is much to be learned by reading their account of their experience. And Elisa is a very good writer.

And if you are so moved to offer more than your prayers and hopes and wishes to the Bonds ... one of the many sad stories out there, but an especially poignant one, I think ... you can do so here.

Tragedy. Sadness. Hope.

Breathtaking Ballerina

What grace! What poise! What beauty!  I had the opportunity to see Alexa dance tonight in a group ballet piece. It was so lovely! They earned a silver medal. I wish I'd been able to see her other group and solo performances but so far those have been during the day when I'm at work. There are a couple performances I should be able to catch on Saturday.

Almost a year has passed since I last had my shoulder massaged. My last massage was at the end of last May. And then I started back to work full time and with it and the exhaustion, I was afraid to commit to an appointment for which I might feel too tired to get to.  But now that my shoulders appear to be thawed and my energy levels are improving, I booked myself in on Tuesday and I'm sure glad I did.  Pam has magic hands. She's "a healer". The first time she gave me a massage, I must confess that I was even a little spooked. It was a pretty amazing experience ... the sense that she's working you over with her mind and energy and not just her hands. My shoulders had a much improved range of motion after she had worked on them. She also gave me a lymphatic massage that will have helped, too. She said my underarm seemed a little extra puffy and I'm sure that's still carry over from lifting groceries on Sunday. It's not nearly as bad but it does take a while ... a few days at least ... for the swelling to come back down to almost normal.  I see her again in 2 weeks. I'm hoping that between her massage and my stretching (thanks, Berny, for the elastic band and pamphlet) that I'll be able to really improve the range of motion in my shoulders.

I would be so happy if my arms could regain ballerina-like grace and flexibility!  I think I remember the first few positions. I'm going to go try them right now and see how close I can get!

Breathtaking Ballerina

Fish Love

Hannah took this video with her iPhone. It's of a very cute box puffer fish at the aquarium in Baltimore. It had a crush on Kevin! The fish would get so obviously excited whenever Kevin would get close to the glass. Those little fins would flutter madly! No wonder Kevin is a fish nerd!

Enjoy!

Fish Love

As I Tell My Kids ... Opt For The Grope!

For those of you who are traveling, please don't get your body scanned and please don't let your kids get their bodies scanned. We've flown a couple of times since body scanners in airports became an issue and though we've seen them, we've never even been asked to use one, for which I'm grateful. If I were asked to use one, I would decline.

For those still contemplating whether or not the radiation emitted from airport naked body scanners is serious enough to avoid, you may be interested to know that many doctors routinely 'opt out' and choose the full-body pat down instead because they recognize the inherent dangers associated with any level of radiation exposure. A recent CNN piece explains that for many doctors, avoiding all sources of radiation whenever possible is just the smart thing to do.

Read the rest of the article here:  Medical doctors speak out about why they avoid naked body scanners at airports.

As I Tell My Kids ... Opt For The Grope!

Just Like Mona Lisa

See? Mona Lisa doesn't have any eyebrows either! I am lousy at drawing on my eyebrows. I don't like drawing on my eyebrows. If my bangs were long enough, I wouldn't but as it is I do look more peculiar than usual if I don't. DRAT today's eyebrow fashion!

My eyebrows got half rubbed off today at my eye appointment. I didn't notice it until I got home after work! That seems to happen quite regularly. Sometimes I accidentally wipe them off myself.

I'm happy to report that my eyes are healthy. They look good. No problems. While I was given a prescription, I was told that it's really my call as to whether I get any or not. I'm told that my eyes are only starting to strain a little with close reading but it's nothing that I notice myself. Mostly he suggests that if I get glasses now, it might make my transition to glasses easier when I really do need them. Because of my particular vision peculiarities, glasses at any time are going to be difficult for me, which he's told me before. I was previously told to avoid them for as long as possible to save myself the misery. I think I'll stick with that and endure the transition when I have to. I've been through enough, dammit. I DO NOT need another physical challenge even though I think it might be fun to wear some funky glasses ... when I feel like it.

My eye doctor told me that rarely sees eyes that are so interesting as mine and he was kind of excited about looking at them. I said, "I bet you say that to everyone!" Apparently my eyes are so interesting because they're so challenging to work with. The reason they're so interesting, apparently, is because one eye is very near sighted and the other is very far sighted. I'm told that when you see people who are 80 years old and still not wearing glasses it's because they have vision like mine - built in bi-focals. The reason glasses will be challenging for me is because my eyes are so used to working together and glasses will ultimately both add some benefits for me while diminishing my vision in other ways. All that considered, I will put off getting glasses for the time being.

What I was most relieved to hear is that my eyes are healthy. He told me that amazingly enough, chemotherapy doesn't typically cause any long term damage to the eyes. Only in rather uncommon cases. Chemo causes some problems, some of which I experienced, during chemo but the eyes typically recover quite quickly. YEAH!! He also told me that while cataracts are listed as a possible side effect of Tamoxifen, his experience is that such cases are very rare. He says it's kind of hard to say for sure because so many women taking Tamoxifen are of an age where they might have developed cataracts anyway.

I came away feeling very relieved that all is okay with my eyes and that as a bonus I don't HAVE to get glasses.

Now that I'm over that hurdle, I can make a dental appointment. I'm not quite so confident about my teeth. I fear I'll need some work done and after my awful abscess last year ... the one that wasn't diagnosed for several days during which I bounced around from dentist to doctor and then back to dentist and lived on morphine and fumes until it was finally treated ... I'm quite terrified about my teeth being "disturbed". Still ... I'd better get them looked at. And polished up.

Just Like Mona Lisa

My Legs Were Not Digitally Enhanced In This Photo

That's me! For real! Okay ... just a shadow of myself but I like it. I love seeing myself so long and lean! This was taken while I walked through one parking lot at the University to get to the mudhole parking lot on the other side of it where I park. It was just so exciting to see a non-snowy and dry piece of earth! And it was warm enough to actually want to stand still for a moment and take a photo. That, too, is a nice change.

It seems I needed a "recovery weekend". In other words, a weekend where I holed up in my house for a while and stayed in the recovery position until I felt well enough to function. As I left work on Friday, I had a funny feeling that I would be having a crash. For that reason I didn't go straight home. I ran into a store and bought a dress first. I need a dress for Josh and Noelene's wedding in two weeks and Mom had given me birthday money for it so I tried on a bunch of things and settled on one. Excuse me for not being REAL excited about it because I still feel like a blob in it. Maybe I'll get more excited after I get out to buy some of those sucky-inny underthings that I will need to carry this dress off. I'm going to need maximum strength sucky-inny underclothes.

I had planned on dress shopping on Saturday but I just had a feeling that I wouldn't be in the mood. So with my dress shopping done on Friday by 7:00, I headed home to grab a bite and then go to my splurge club party, which I was really looking forward to. But the minute I got home, I pretty much crashed. I thought perhaps I was just hungry so I ate and waited for my revival. But no such luck. I was totally wiped. So I didn't go to splurge and I missed out on all the fun. I curled up on the couch and only moved to get myself to bed. I told myself that I'd feel energized tomorrow at least.

But I didn't feel terribly energetic on Saturday either. I was still in my pj's when Luke's lacrosse game started at 11:00. I followed the live stats and emailed updates to Kevin, who was in Calgary, throughout the game. Bellarmine lost the game by 2 after a great last quarter. If they'd played like that in the 2nd quarter, they'd have won that game. Luke got a couple of goals and an assist. I was glad he had a good game, at least, though the win would have especially exciting with this being a "conference game".

After the game ended at 1:00, I still couldn't get myself moving. I wouldn't have gone anywhere or done anything if I hadn't made a hair appointment for 4:00. So I had a nice visit with Van at Crimpers and got my hair coloured and shaped. It's a little less like a fuzzy ball after Van works his magic. Hopefully I learned something. It's funny how grey my hair was when it first came back but that there's hardly any grey to cover ever since I got that first nonpermanent colour the first time. Van says my new growth isn't as curly as my first growth. That's somewhat comforting.

After that I went out for dinner with a girlfriend and then curled up in a ball on the couch again. It was mostly an unproductive day.

But today I woke up feeling better so I ran some errands, stopped at a book store (where I bought NOTHING, by the way - that doesn't happen very often - not at a book store!), I washed the car, got groceries, cleaned the house, cleaned and chopped bunches of vegetables for the fridge. I played a bit with my fabric and put together some combinations that look very exciting! I have some small projects in mind and can't wait to get started on them! I really enjoy the mixing and matching of fabrics. I'm a little afraid to cut into them but I'm just going to have to get over that, won't I?

And now Kevin's back from Calgary and tomorrow starts another week. I hope I got myself rested enough to have a good week. I have no more trouble with the wound on my back. It's healing nicely now even though it will be a bigger scar than it would have been had it not separated. Oh well. At least it's on my back where I won't see it much. I notice that my underarm is sore a little swollen tonight. Even though I thought I was being quite careful about how I managed groceries, I must have carried some too heavy bags. That seems to be the only thing that causes swelling under my arm. I hope it goes back to normal overnight.

I have an eye appointment tomorrow. The first one since a couple of years before my breast cancer diagnosis. The chemo messes with eyes and the Tamoxifen I'm on now has "may cause cataracts" as a side effect. I wonder if I'll need glasses yet. I'm going to go out on a limb and guess, "no".

My Legs Were Not Digitally Enhanced In This Photo

Happy Birthday, Kathy!

Happy Birthday, Kathy!