Wednesday, November 18, 2009

Back on Track ... Ohmmmmm ...

After a couple of days of shock, panic, tears, rage and all that demoralizing, energy-sapping stuff, I'm back on track. I can't say I'm in a "happy place" but I'm able to laugh again and embrace silliness. The only tears I feel compelled to shed right now are tears of gratitude for your love and support. I feel like I have my feet back on the ground again.

I am so impressed with my friends and grateful for all of you. You really helped me through this rough patch. I've had some other difficult times but they were mostly times I expected. This one caught me off guard and so threw me for more of a loop perhaps. Thanks so much to all of you for picking me up when I was down, for dusting me off, giving me a big hug and then lifting me over this very big hurdle, setting me gently down on the ground again, and giving me an encouraging nudge toward the finish line. You really did and I so needed that. Thank God for my team.

Velma reminded me that it's important to focus on what radiation is doing FOR me and less on what it's doing TO me. She is so right. Yesterday I was thinking to myself how best to mentally get through this time and it occurred to me that for one reason or another, I've stopped reminding myself that these treatments are meant to save my life. That's a good thing. As Velma says, "Thank God for radiation!". She calls it an "attitude of gratitude". Velma's been there. She knows. She suggests imagining those radiation beams zapping evil cancer cells.

And all of you have given me such encouragement and useful images to help me find my courage and strength again ... from your gentle, supportive notes to your enthusiastic pep talks. It's all been so helpful. You're all my angels and I really felt you lifting and carrying me. Thanks so much.

So ... this morning ... 3 down - 27 to go!

Ankle Report: Slimmer! Near Normal.

Radiation Report: Intermittent aching in my left breast and consistent tenderness under my arm. I think it's a bit swollen there, causing some discomfort.

Keep Calm and Carry On!


  1. PH...I'm so glad to hear you're back to feeling more grounded again! Hang in there...only 27 more to go!! YIPPEE! YAHOO! YOU CAN DO IT!! YOU ARE DOING IT!!...KEEPING CALM & CARRYING ON!


  2. Hi Devy! And now, already, I'm down to 24 left! May the time go quickly! Thanks for cheering your favourite princess cousin on! Ohmmmmm ...


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