Tuesday, November 3, 2009

A Mere Shadow of Myself

This is one of the photos I was glad to have recovered. Thanks, Lori!! This is me waiting on the sidewalk for Kevin to come out of the corner store. I like this photo of me for several reasons, one being that I look so tall and thin. I mostly like that it's the opposite of how I feel. Right now I feel like my face is the biggest part of my body (my face and my ankles, that is). Here it's the smallest. A veritable pinhead! Me? Yes. ME!! There is no evidence of my extra double chins or moon face in this photo. In fact, I look dark and maybe even dangerous. What a contrast to how I felt that day as I inched along the sidewalk, toddling ... looking like a walker might in order. Pardon my vanity, but this is my current favourite photo of me.

This morning I had the unfortunately positioned mole removed. Kevin came with me for moral support. You would think "procedures" would get easier when you've been through so many but I find it just makes it harder. This one really was no biggie but I confess to being a little babyish about it when I wasn't at all silly about the one I had removed in December before all this cancer business raised its ugly head. That one I went to on my own and drove to work right after. This time, it was nice to know Kevin was there. I was home and back in bed before 8:30. Sans mole.

I talked to the doctor about the pain I have in that same area and after checking it out, his best guess was the beginnings of another dose of shingles. He ruled out bone and muscle pain issues and it's not a lump. It's slightly swollen but there's no infection and it's very typical of the place and the way shingles might start. Let's hope it's not that. I'm starting my acyclovir today again just in case. Shingles. Wouldn't that be just great?! NOT!!

As for my edema, the doctor thinks it's fall-out from the prednisone and the chemo. This supports what Addie (Sylvia's go-to cancer specialist) suspects. (Thanks, Addie!) Addie's feelings are that I will probably just have to ride out the edema and wait for it to subside on it's own and that she wouldn't be surprised if I still had edema a month from now. As long as I understand it, I can deal with it and, between Addie and my doctor, I have enough information to at least quell my fretting. So, I'll just have to be patient for slimmer ankles and hope there's no snow for a while because I won't be getting into boots any time soon.


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