Friday, January 15, 2010

Berny and Me

Today I finally met Berny in person! She was in town for medical appointments and so we arranged to have lunch together at Truffles, which turned out to be closed, so we went to Tusq. It was wonderful to finally meet her in person after meeting online through the blogosphere! I serendipitously found Berny's Boob Blog one day last summer while doing some breast cancer research and got so much comfort (yes, comfort) and information from reading about her ongoing experience with breast cancer. It turned out that we had the same surgeon and oncologist! While my treatment has come to an end ... hallelujah!! ... Berny's will continue on for some time yet. Even though this has been going on for a very long time for her and she has a lot to go through yet, she is a real inspiration. She has such grace and serenity and, as my cousin Velma recommends, "an attitude of gratitude". I found a great mentor in Berny.

I should always remember to fluff my wig before a photo! It's looking very wiggish here. Kind of like a helmet. My own hair was never very helmet-like, though I often wished for a much more controlled look than I ever managed. Still, I want my wild, unruly hair back asap!!

Last night I was very tired. VERY tired. It hit me like a brick at supper time. I slept a long time today, too. I only got up at 11:00, which wasn't much time to erase the pillow creases from my face in time to meet Berny! In fact, they were probably still there!

A little shout out to Gillian, who I saw downtown! She had walked all the way even though she still has a nasty cold. She had missed the bus to campus and was generally feeling a little beleaguered! Poor Gillian! We hugged.

I have things to do at home today and I'll probably take it kind of easy. We have a social event to look forward to tomorrow night! I want to be rested up so I can thoroughly enjoy it! It's a kaiser tournament. I've only played kaiser a couple of times ever so I'm not very good but I've been assured that there will be other kaiser newbies there, too. And it doesn't sound like they take it very seriously either, so deal me in.

My heart goes out to the people of Haiti and all who have been directly impacted by the earthquake. How awful!



  1. Have a good rest Heather, from what I remember you picked up the game very well. Don't be discouraged you were up against a couple of pros haha. Unfortunately we won't be there Patty's mom and dad are celebrating there 50th anniversary.

  2. Whew I just finished reading all the posts since Dec 31...well that photo is about as awful as I thought it would be :-/ oh well in a few months when I have hair and hopefully shed a few pounds maybe we can try again... We forgot to do the big reveal! I wanted to show you my hair which just Wed my hairdresser told me that unfortunately it just isn't quite long enough for her to do anything with.
    Yoga is great and I go once per week. The instructor here is really good. I always feel so good after a class.

    About the eyebrows (BTW yours looked good to me today). Did you ever take in the Look Good Feel Good seminar at the Champion Centre? They showed us how to put on eyebrows. I will email the instructions to you. I still have to draw mine on.

    Two more things we have in common - crying at the most inopportune of times and Kaiser! (though I haven't played that much in years.)

    Anyway it was really great meeting you today and I have a feeling that this is the beginning of a very long friendship :o)

    Cheers to you my new found friend!

  3. And I feel a connection to both of you; having worked with Heather at that "dreaded law firm" and having been born and raised in the Nipawin area and graduating from L.P. Miller High School some 37 years ago!! I don't recognize you by your picture, Berny, but perhaps our paths crossed somewhere along the way.

    Once again, it reminds me what a small world it is.

    Good luck and good health to you both!

    Lyn Ronald

  4. Hey Ron and Patty! Since you can't be there, the kaiser event has been changed to the 30th! Maybe I can get some practice between now and then so I can kick your butts!! hahahaha ... wouldn't that just FROST you, my winning friend, Patty?!

  5. Happy Anniversary, to your parents, Patty! I hope you have a wonderful celebration and that they thoroughly enjoy it!

  6. Hi Berny! I share your thoughts on the photo in terms of myself! GAG!! I've had to put my vanity in check and just face that this is the way I look for now. Hopefully things will improve for both of us as we strive to get our bodies back!

    I thought later, too, that we hadn't compared hair growth! Next time! Of course, you can see mine on my blog later today. I want to wash and fluff it first before I take a photo - give it maximum visual opportunity!

    I attended the Look Good Feel Good seminar, too, with my buddy, Carol, but I attended just before I started chemo so I still all hair intact. I did pay attention during the eyebrow seminar and that was helpful ... until my own started growing back ... in all the wrong places! I'm getting better at it, though. Still, I now feel like I've been given the secret handshake to the club of women who choose to remove their eyebrows and draw them on for all eternity. I've decided that it's easier, though I'm not willing to take that step ... yet.

    Next time we get together, Berny, we'll compare more notes. You can give me an eyebrow tutorial. Maybe we could play drunken hairdresser (a favourite game) and see what kind of "doos" we can manage with limited resources!

    I'm so glad we've met!

    Take care and continued good luck to you. See you soon!

  7. Hi Lyn,

    It could be that Berny didn't live in Nipawin when you lived there because she and her family have moved around a bit. But she's there now and has been for a while so you surely know a lot of the same people at least. It is a small world, isn't it. Even that I found Berny through the internet is amazing. She's been such an inspiration and source of knowledge and experience to me. Even when she didn't know it. It's been wonderful to meet her in person.

    Thanks for the e-Christmas card you sent, Lyn. It's so pretty! Happy New Year to you and your beautiful family. It will be hard to top last year for you, I think.

  8. Hi Lyn I just moved to Nipawin in 2001 so I didn't but my kids all three graduated from LP. If you are willing to share you maiden name with me, I might know some of your relatives or you can email me - Heather has the address.

    Heather there is not much you can do with this mop (drunk or sober) than wash and fluff haha. I did put some mousse in it today and it went a little curly. Now I am just working up the courage to go for the big reveal when we get together with Murray's family this week. That wig is just so uncomfortable and I don't want to wear the toque for the funeral either so we'll see. It's not like any of them don't know what I've all been through.

  9. Hi Berny - my maiden name was "Street" and I grew up on a farm 2 miles east of Codette. My cousin and his wife currently operate a market garden there - check it out this summer if you get a minute - it is spectacular!

    Sorry, Heather, for getting side-tracked on your blog.

    Hugs, Lyn

  10. Lyn! Of course you haven't side-tracked my blog! It's so cool that you and Berny have some come connection by location and I'm so happy to have been able to facilitate. I'll bet Berny has been to your cousin's market garden, she and I both now being very careful about the foods we eat and trying to avoid chemicals.

  11. Berny, you go for it girl! Show your new hair to the world with courage and pride! There's no better place to go for the big reveal than among the safety and love of family and friends. I'll be reminding myself of that very thing when my time comes because I know it ain't going to be easy! Vanity, oh vanity!

    I think it's pretty exciting that you're at the point where you can use "hair product"! Mousse? I wonder how long until I get there?

    Courage, my friend. Courage. With all you've been through already, this will be nothing more than a moment if self consciousness.

  12. Lyn - one of my homecare nurses was Faye Street and my son graduated with her daughter Rebecca. I do go to the farmers market in the summer but I don't know any of their names so I might have bought veggies from them.

    Heather your hair looks thicker than mine. Thin hair (another unfortunate side effect of the tamoxafin). It seems to be growing faster too - mine isn't that thick or long but the mousse helped it stand up and brought out the curls. Yes I need to wear my badge of courage as I get teary just thinking about the big reveal.

  13. Market garden not farmers market - duh. I have heard of it and I will go check it out next summer for sure!

  14. Berny,

    I would be teary, too, trying to muster up the strength to go without a wig for the first time. I'm sure I will be when I get to that point. With or without a wig, I don't look like me to me anymore.

    Remember, though ... all at YOUR pace. If the reveal seems like too much at an already emotional time, just plop that damn thing on your head once again if it makes it easier to get through the day. There will LOTS of time for more gradual "reveals", if that makes it easier. The mental and emotional game is the one we have to work, isn't it?

    Just do what you can handle and know that you're obviously one tough chickie, having got this far with such a wonderful attitude and sense of humour.


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